The Dance of the black Swans. Joanna's Page 55
Yulia Ivanova
The Dance of the black Swans. Joanna's Page 55
***
Her life was going in this way.
Underground and educational activities, flowers to maintain the budget, father Tikhon, sometimes on urgent business trips to Moscow and Ignatius.
It seems, always will be. Also unnoticed is to diminish her time with Luzhino's sun gilding the trunks of the pines. And just one day dissolve in the thickening starry darkness Ignatius' 'Joanna'. And her mysterious and beautiful girl's face outside the window the evening train, flying to Moscow for nearly three decades ago, all melt away into eternity.
The fiftieth anniversary approached. The sunset time was waiting for her, and she wanted to write a book on the way to God, where she hoped to convey to the reader of theology and the foundations of Orthodoxy, at that time was needed air.
But 'tomorrow' was rising on the horizon is inevitable and ominous, like a monster in the picture early Darenov.
1985 was coming.
Gorbachev called Sakharov, and returned the rebel from his exile!
A ballerina who ran away to the West was allowed to visit Moscow.
It's fantastic!' Said Natalia Makarova to shocked journalists.
They stopped jamming Radio Liberty!
Joanna started to listen to the news, not understanding why events that cause her puzzled and sad in his chest ached from the foreboding, caused universal rejoicing among friends, family, the majority of believers. Now, they say, God allowed. Not to mention the intellectual circles.
'A fresh wind of change' in a burst fracture swinging all his house.
Of course, the changes were brewing for a long time. Rotting bottoms and tops, this collective is a madhouse, the nursery school with a fig in my pocket. Perhaps it was necessary to start something gently tighten up somewhere while gently releasing.
But in this new, so to speak, 'tunes' from the outset of the new government was played a solid false, disharmony, or even just a hammer on the piano.
Something bad, satanic, beginning with the bloody marks on the top of the head secretary-general, chief conductor. Suddenly unleashed a series of accidents and disasters, self-fulfilling prophecies of the Bible and, of course, the first chords of the new government - solid hopeless failures.
All was wrong, catastrophes with an infinite extension.
She could not name a single correct note; of the two evils, always choose the more and more often both of them. Changed leaders, government and the opposition but to the best nothing has changed. Rather, it turned out with a minus sign.
It was ridiculous, harmful, helpless, not so, not that, not there and good for nothing. All failed. Well, at least on the theory of probability should have been something out but no.
Malicious focused collapse, or cannot explain. Strangulation, then to break it to pieces and devour.
Predator claws helplessly prostrate body of the country.
In August '91 she was happy: Russia was saved, they came to their senses!
And then in impotent despair, watched 'Swan Lake', the drunken crowd on the streets of Moscow, shaking hands at the 'conspirators' and drowned in a lie, becoming more insolent, finally triumphed.
And no more worrying about verisimilitude, screamed about his 'full and final'.
Victory Dance of the Black Swan, a werewolf. A few years later, he repeated, is no longer on the scene.
Strikingly similar to Odette Odile sowed death and destruction everywhere.
Mystical ritual nature of what is happening in particular shook; strange murder and suicide, the coincidence of dates with the church upheavals, massive acquisition of the relics, secret gatherings in the distant Malta.
Raging Ocean, the Masonic Order, the continuer of the great cause of the party with bloody marks near the Masons. And the devil's cocktail of general paralysis, indifference, greed and lust for power.
More recently, the words Valentin Rasputin on the possibility of entering the Russian Federation from the Union provoked laughter as something paradoxical, absurd, more or less successful joke. No this is the Supreme Council, standing, applauding his own almost unanimous decision to Russian sovereignty, not cut, they voted to secede from the head of the body.
'Maybe, they overeat in your buffet!'
In the hearts of the plug pulling out the plug the TV, Joanna jumped into the street, where the local walking grandmother, discussing the latest series.
Any high-level meeting, fateful decisions, sovereignty, and the fate of the fatherland they were up to the lantern.
Joanna screamed in vain about the inevitable collapse of the country, resulting in their separation from the Luzhino require the Moscow region, will lead its own currency, and Russian army. That Russians will now be driven from everywhere. What our ancestors for centuries harvested the land, pouring their sweat and blood, that our only chance of survival to be together.
That all falls apart, and that this should not be, because there should never be.
Grandmother only nodded politely, while they themselves were thinking about retirement, whether the manure is brought from a nearby farm: to whom and how much. And whose boy was now going from the station.
And they went to their series. es
A few years after the bombing in Grozny, dig up a woman. The first thing she asks not about the fate of other family members, but what ended the next series.
The hardest thing to get used to Joanna was with this new reality, or rather unreality where everything they touch or the new rulers, turning into decay and blood to those of the apocalypse in a single country, multi-part horror.
Either the collective folly or atrophy.
As in a fantastic story, she once wrote about the ground, got on another planet where the atmosphere is killed feelings of the people making a cross between a robot and animals.
Only two of immunity, He and She are among living dead men.
Could Joanna have imagined what would happen to her?
Is it making zombies? The sinister role of the media, especially the needle of the Ostankino? Are these intrigues of 'masons'?
Is this sudden destruction of the external barriers, the Papuan products, cheap bikes lying on the box was deprived at once seems to be how she used to think, a great people with great spiritual traditions of reason and the human face? At least triggered survival instinct!
All this is shockingly reminiscent of collective suicide, mass release of the whales ashore.
It also initially duped former Secretary of Sverdlovsk their travel on the tram to the district health center, but Joanna quickly figured out what was what.
The people, as befits a pre-programmed to commit suicide again and again dumped on the shore, where the fortunes of the spacy and power, drunken old child duril, courage and broke everything that came under his fingerless hands: the fate, the laws of life, the country's borders with its crazed inhabitants.
Well, ordinary people even the people named in the Gospel of the herd, in need of a good shepherd. People just fell off the chain. In the Chukchi, for example, instead of the word 'freedom' use 'broken loose'.
When the 'broken loose' Anchar with crazed barking fussing at first inaccessible spaces, courtyards and other people's knots is aware of its misfortune?
When he wants to eat, or get hit with a stick?
Lost, but decided to come back, find the gates closed landlady, and the booth occupied by another dog?
Or even the ashes?
Or hit by a car, I mean under the wheel of history?
They managed to buy cheap rags, yapping on the right who pleases and whenever you want, hang around, anywhere, and fuck with anyone after seventy years of Soviet-style post: Give all power to the benefit of the country and society. Personal enrichment and materialism are unworthy vestiges of the past ...
'Die but save your friend', even bread crust divide in two', be modest in your everyday life, be faithful to your wife, a good example for children. 'Grandchildren will be born then, everything will be repeated from the beginning.'
Anywhere debates about the girl's honor, can a girl be friends with a boy?
Talk to the party bureau amoral behavior and Komsomol meetings. Heard - resolved: return to the family.
It is ridiculous to remember?
But what about in the Bible about the 'seductive eye', which is better to tear? Also, like, not very humane!
And then you as a bolt from the blue, and 'Emmanuel' in the box, and erotic massage at home, and kiwi, Canary Islands, even beyond their means, but because in principle it is possible!
Walk, Anchar, no chains, everything is permitted. What's Sochi, Yalta and Gagra with sanatorium vouchers, rooms for savages ruble bed, with mandarin oranges and pineapple guava per two rubles a kilo. Tally-ho it, the power. Yet once again forced to work for the good of his beloved country!
Tally-ho it, the Homeland! Who do I need it? Give America! Here's how Smerdyakov had once dreamed of, 'won a clever nation stupid', and defeated the Germans would take us to the 41-m, would be living now in America.
We have Western workers, whores, shuttle but free!
'No you're not free, a "shake off!' I wanted to shout stupid seduced the people, and especially that of its former range, whom she knew so well. For what they are now angrily biting and gnawing at one time to feed them a hand, so that the first obsequiously licked!
Participate in sophisticated fraud robbing neighbors in exchange for handouts from the master's table ...
'But I can now go to Paris.' as the bard, a former 'conscience of the nation', said.
Trample on the dead and the ideals and traditions of centuries-old Russian culture, which had once worshiped, and taught the people to worship. Splash in the new books and movies; settlers of his own soul.
As if all of them with Denis Film about evil, aspiring Korchagin-Kolchugin flooded the underground, the whole country traced blood-black marks.
And that's all you want to say? You bite the former owners, passers-by and each other, and dirtied trample all around, fucked same slipped mongrels, and then crawl on their bellies to the new bars in the new slavery for a bowl of soup and bone.
And you will be told to lie against anyone; that's all your freedom!
'He knew that the rise in Russia, the waiter an hour of great danger for our country and say,' I hate the whole of Russia. '"In the 12th year was a great invasion of the French emperor Napoleon the first, and well, if I have then conquered those same Frenchmen: clever nation would have conquered a very stupid one and annexed. Not even the other orders would be.'
(F. Dostoevsky).
Joanna began to write papers, listen to radio Liberty and the news on TV, hoping that something is about to happen, changes to the laws of common sense, people came to, come out into the streets, drive away, swept away.
But nothing happened, except it became worse day to day, long ago crossed the collapse of all conceivable limits.
Innocent boys, opened the first private cafe on Kropotkin, the first farmers, the party millionaire Artem Tarasov, who paid three million dues-long if all gasped at this point, there was a long time anti-alcohol campaign, and his wife prayed to the portraits of Gorbachev?
And they also sell at the underground low-standard vodka and cigarettes, Tarasov and private cafes multiply exponentially, and the 'servants of the people' publicly burned membership cards.
'Let no man seek his own, but each benefits the other.'
(Corinthians 10:24).
'You are bought with a price, do not become slaves of men.'
(1 Corinthians 7:23).
'There's been a terrible'. as claimed by popular advertising.
The familiar world of immutable, something ridiculous, ostentatious, conditional, something, maybe bad, but where and bloopers, and the flaws were "our" does not cause a deep protest, suddenly began to sway, began to spread, and the replaced by a something foreign, totally alien and rejected.
What was happening was impossible, unthinkable. It was the end of the world.
Ignatius to whom she rushed for an explanation and reassurance again became a dissident and now terrified parishioners bleak sermons on the invasion of dark forces against Russia, which re-crucified, and it is only the beginning.
They crucify Holy Russia, yes, do not be surprised. They say, Soviet Russia was the successor of Holy Russia with all the evil of power, since managed to keep the people in the commandments. And for the murders of priests and temples of the destruction of the leaders of the answer, in which the nation was in obedience.
Yes, the government professed atheism, it is his sin, but for the people; even though he was deprived of unchurched and sacraments, but the soul of the people with all the prejudice, stupidity, superstition was a child clean and open to faith, goodness and love.
God lived in the hearts; it is said the fruit of the tree folk - the selfless patriotism; and the war, and during the reconstruction of the destroyed economy, clean and family friendly relations, unselfishness, and greedy...
Yes, in the ears of faith is not mentioned, but 'by their fruits ye shall know them'.
God victoriously broke the devil, atheist barriers and sprouted in the hearts of Soviet people, their good deeds.
'And you, as often now pronouncing the name of the Lord?' denounced his father Andrew, 'requiring us shepherds to bless market places, receptions, banks? Your money smell the blood of widows and orphans, robbed the people killed in fratricidal strife people once great country that it the throne of the Lord!
You donate to the temple, but did not know that the Lord will not accept an unjust sacrifice? Think of Cain. Do not flatter yourself: you cannot simultaneously serve God and Mammon.
You want to be princes and allowed to tear apart their own country, betrayed the cause Sergius and other saints.
You captured the public property acquired by the joint self-sacrificing labor of your fathers and grandfathers ...
You transgress women, girls, children, forgetting that a purely woe to those who come from the temptations.
You are excited to do sin. Shackles fell, down them! Your devotion, your willingness to serve the cause of Christ were hypocrisy, hypocrisy.
'Now you tell me how is it that the priest took under the protection of godless power! Well, first of all, to God God's and to Caesar Caesar's. Yes, the church was separated from the state, active believers has not been easy. We've all experienced it ourselves.
But we went to church, communion, even members of the Komsomol and party members. Although some of you were forced to deny Christ? Or the state intervened in ecclesiastical canons of cathedrals in the order, the teaching of our holy fathers?
And now foreign sects flooded, not tea, fighting off ... Priests at the party dragged all the fancy as a wedding generals ... In the box wizards, astrologers, psychics all kinds; and all of them seems to wear crosses, and all of them seems to be from God...
Your freedom smells of sulfur, my children!
Yes, we lived behind the fence, but as the philosopher said, 'one who cannot obey himself has orders.'
The Lord has given us everything you need. Yes, we lived without luxury, but is surplus not a sin.
Yes, we were hard on the orders of the idlers and loafers; so something else about the apostle Paul says: 'He who does not work, neither shall he eat.'
With regard to the so-called rights of sexual minorities - so is the Lord described as a terrible sin of Sodom, for which all burned two towns.
Drug addicts, fornicators, robbers; about all of these sins in the Bible there are the most stringent definitions.
'Democracy is in hell, and the kingdom of heaven,' said John of Kronstadt.
Christ on the crucifix was placed in a democratic way - so decided majority.
So, we Orthodox would have to expect from the new Caesar, except the opportunity to carry the Word of God to every corner of the country and the restoration of churches, a more rigorous protecting society from evil.
A freedom of sexual minorities even require an agency's ministers, their name is legion!
But no, you, warriors of heaven, rejoice from orgy!
'The Lord gave us protection in the face of the state. Education is free, many people got free apartment, the possibility of a normal decent work and leisure. Although even then, of course, flourished all crooks on the nomenclature and other elites - that with which you had to fight and not to put this rag-tag on the throne with the rights of unlimited power!
You hated Soviet elite for special rations and forgive special palaces to current authorities. Probably because they were released and your leash.
But you, then it must be inside!
But the real Communists and their privileges are not used, they worked day and night, the party selected the best, moral, and capable of working, talented ... Although there were, of course, careerists, but most enjoyed the benefits of a manicurist with numerous relatives and dressmakers. Yes, and it is assumed the character of a serious illness, when it was undermined by the ideology, in fact, anti-predatory one.
Our fathers and grandfathers of these communists, was a privilege the first in the fight to the construction site, where more difficult.
This is not the agitation to protest the red-brown, my father was secretary of the Regional Committee in Siberia, and I know what people then moved mountains.
The Lord has given us to stand against fascism, rebuild the ruined country; it was done by those who trample on you now! All of us have been granted: peace, prosperity, from hunger nobody died, no digging in the trash. And treated, and all tours, dispensaries, kindergartens, pioneer camp, forgotten?
Tuberculosis, child homelessness, prostitution, drug addiction; it was under the Communists had never heard of, but it is worth it!
And in the temples, we went with you, although there were restrictions. But the more the crown of sorrow, and have undergone persecution for their faith.
'We'll wait in all godliness and honesty,' We prayed and the Lord gave!
We lived in a great country with Orthodox tradition, in peace and harmony with each other.
Of course, anything can happen, but because it was the first serious attempt of society; I emphasize - of society, not separate religious communities! - To confront a fallen human nature!
We were accused that we lived as if God does not exist.
It is not true! We lived as if the devil does not. If we can be safe 'to live a beautiful life' and to walk hand in hand in a brighter future. And no one will tempt us to selfishness, greed, envy, no one will be whispering, 'Eat, you will not die.'
If it were not for the devil, we may have in your stepped to Communism, but he is the devil. He was right there, and gradually beat us, but we did not call in the help of the Lord, even though 'this kind of overpowered only by fasting and prayer.'
Ironically, the seemingly godless state should compel us to live the commandments, preached that there is no longer a feat, he lay his life for his friends 'that the bread crust and the other half'.
And as for the people, and for God, for 'Who will feed them, shelter, will have mercy, he helped me.' Remember the parable of the Last Judgment.
The Lord will judge us for mercy, in relation to the neighbor, and not according to how often you repeat: 'Lord, Lord'.
'Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth perishable but imperishable, in heaven - the Lord said. The authorities forbade us to acquire too much, especially at the expense of others, and unjust way.
Proudhon said that every property was theft. Recall, 'Depart from me, ye that work iniquity.'
Would the power forbid you to do good, to live humbly, honestly and morally?
Who is your freedom is not the desire to live in God, no.
You are cunning; you want freedom of improper conduct.
You want to feast, when sitting at your feet robbed poor people.
Remember: only for the sin of the rich man was cast down to hell, but probably also believe in God. And the beggar Lazarus went to heaven. By the way, about his faith, too, said nothing.
One sitting in rags, and other feasting just for a sentence of eternal death. Because you cannot revel when someone close is bad! Such a soul torn away the Light, for it is darkness.
Yes, I say to you today; I certainly pity the poor, fleeced, and rummaging in garbage dumps, but I'm much more sorry for you, my children, rich! For their reward will be offended and reject those who abuse and seducing sky.
And I feel sorry for yourself, your pastor, who is responsible for you to Heaven.
So I am for the power that would help me to save you and save as instructed Lord, and not put to death all over the satanic trap, arousing the darkest savage instincts.
Even in the gay priests already tipped, screaming about 'human rights'.
Where is then our law, where protection of the very foundations of our faith from the satanic innovations?
The Soviet government at some stage, if the affliction raging atheists smashing icons and temples, then, thank God, not climbing to the very foundations of Orthodox ethics with their innovations that much worse.
In the latter we shall soon see. And let's think about who is better: Caesar, who in virtue of his office had to shed blood, violate the commandment, to cheat, lie, no matter even from good or evil motives.
So, what is better: so that Caesar never appeared publicly before the people in the church, asking for a blessing from the Supreme clergy 'hot work, the bloody things?'
In exercising their right to secret confession, or even just in my heart wounded, because such a bloody daunting burden for any human being; even in his heart to confess to God?
Or suppose that Caesar in public with TV shows will request and receive from the church to continue its good work?
Think it not a terrible temptation for parishioners; the consecration of the church too, to put it mildly, of righteousness?
God, as we know, is not mocked, but what about the clergy?
Such cases are known, comes to the memory of the seventeenth year, when the people said, 'Until God is high, far to the king' and 'Nobody will give us deliverance'.
It should not be, I am deeply convinced of this. This is me on the allegations against the Soviet power, especially in the bloody periods of combat with the enemy, that it supposedly is not converging with the Church.
So the freedom of the boys selling cigarettes or gasoline, instead of going to school, is questionable.
And I am your shepherd, I shall be for such a power, which, if not to help me feed the flock, or at least will not make them wolves.
It's a pity you, my children, so striving to open a cafe, firms and banks.
Yes, imagine, I am for such an order where there will be rich. Where there are few who uses the God-given wealth, bequeathed as: it usually corrupts and destroys the soul. Begin envy, wrath, anger, fighting, blood, murder, revolution, and here too the poor salvation not to be seen.
A national 'sovereignty'? All of this sin of idolatry. I understand the desire to practice their faith, develop national culture and language.
But his army! These potentates, ready to separate the arm from the body for the sake of obtaining personal power and profit. No, it is better friendships in prison than the war in the wild.
Potentates now multiplying like flies. And seize himself, begin disassembling each other, the blood flows, 'in slaves forelocks crack.'
And foreign fans right there, they discord and weakness of our oh so incidentally, for 'divide and conquer'.
And about this 'freedom' you ask God? Do not guess how it will end? Or blind, did not know who 'runs the show'?
Truly, when God wants to punish, deprive the mind.
You have the opportunity to go to church and take communion, communion, and children were calm for them.
Yes, you can delete the faith of the party, sometimes to ask the responsible for ideological work, to exclude from the Komsomol, but is it so important?
Are we under Brezhnev were killed for their faith, as once the martyrs? No, the Lord kept us in the infinite mercy of His, and the Orthodox Church in prayer thanking Him for it.
Which of these 'rights' we do not have enough, where it is said about them in the Bible?
Freedom for 'blue', predators, idolaters, fornicators, drug addicts we missed? Those do not inherit the kingdom of God, forgotten refer to the sixth chapter of First Corinthians.
Surely at the end of the twentieth century you children of Christ, who read not only by Pushkin, Gogol, Dostoevsky, and had access to patristic literature, Russian religious philosophers of the so-called Silver Age. Surely you still have to learn that freedom is not lust, and freedom from the lusts of the Lord expects of us?
As in Gogol's 'Wiy' breaks our heart every evil. The authority locked the door, this one opens.
The life of earth is staying on death row. To seek clemency for a new life and have fun in anticipation of punishment is our choice.
'I have a right to say so, I went through a whole hell of earthly 'pleasures'. And complain that I did not give freedom mad. Until he came to the line...'
Father Andrew predicted a horrendous experience 'broken loose' country, ungrateful people, have not been able to appreciate the bounty and mercy of the Creator and fallen into madness.
He recommended to throw out the TV or watch only the news and popular science transfer, and walking to psychics warned would not allow for communion.
He was not blessed to give money to the growth - not only in all sorts of 'financial pyramids' but in the usual 'reliable' banks to speculate vouchers. He greeted only producers of goods.
But these quickly burn out.
Ignatius' flock was thinning. Now, right out of the temple, with a confession, hurried to the firm. They came in foreign cars, the expensive fur coats and mobile phones, which raised a squeak during the service directly.
'Father, we work, what else should new do?
They frequently went out blubbered.
'Look,' he denounced his father Andrew, 'Natalya children in tattered shoes, get out feet wet. To whom do you show off; fear God, because taken away all at once.
Ladies wiped tears and sacrificed 'for Natasha' crumpled banknotes, probably thinking to yourself that it would be better were Natasha's guys selling well, not vodka and cigarette smoke, as gasoline. And no problem.
And then many women stopped coming.
And Natasha did not go, had grown into the market and rushed to Turkey for jackets.
'You are disingenuous,' repeated father Andrew. 'You are up in arms against communism, not because of his alleged atheism, not because of repression; the blood will be shed and the shed is incomparably more.
You will crave their licentiousness, which restrained the Soviet regime.
'All for One and One for All' is not there some kind of "soviet" ethics; this is the second New Testament commandment to love one's neighbor. All of our current life is against this commandment, the principle of competition, it is fundamentally contrary to.
So the custom since the first Christians; they were his sermon as an eyesore in the world lying in wickedness.
'Yes, now you can preach, distribute and publish religious literature, but a lot of you now preach and distribute? When was the last time went to the monastery, as it did before? Even to St. Sergius, not to mention Balaam?
In Babylon, now you're driving, ladies and gentlemen.
'This people draweth nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoureth me with [their] lips; but their heart is far from me. Which devour widows' houses, and for a shew make long prayers: the same shall receive greater damnation.'
Ignatius prophesied at the beginning of perestroika, that power is coming worse. Being in the euphoria of perestroika flock is not too pleased, and after August 91 th, and is no longer like someone from the church authorities.
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